Showing posts with label The Gov'ment. Show all posts
Showing posts with label The Gov'ment. Show all posts

Wednesday, September 3, 2008

Overheard in Downtown Saint Paul Last Night

"Those cops are fuckers. We weren't doing anything wrong."

-20-something female talking on her cell phone walking down a downtown Saint Paul sidewalk alone last night. She was nearly in tears and obviously shaken up.

"You're going to want to move into the lobby if those crazies start moving this way."

-Policeman in full riot gear to me, my wife and daughter last night a couple minutes after the girl from the previous quote walked by.

So the Republican National Convention is in town this week, just a couple miles from our house. Yay!

There are large protests and many arrests going on this week. Some of the arrests are, for sure, warranted. People have torn bricks out of buildings and thrown them at cops. Some even threw buckets of piss and shit at cops. That blows. That's obviously breaking the law with intent to harm another person. Not cool.

That said, a lot of arrests are not warranted. Sure, protesters may be breaking a law like marching past curfew or camping in a park that doesn't allow camping, but most of these people aren't hurting anyone. They aren't actively harming people or property. They don't deserve pepper spray and tear gas.

There's a great 2-part video on the theuptake.org. Here's Part 1 and Part 2.

Part 1 shows a group of protesters at a stand-off with police. The protesters threw first, I've read. I tend to believe those reports. But the stinger, Part 2, shows how innocent bystanders get rounded up with protesters. They all get arrested.

Sucks to be them, I guess.

Hmmm, maybe I shouldn't have gone downtown two days in a row?

Why did I go downtown last night, you ask? We went to the taping of the Daily Show! It was a blast. You can watch the show we were at the taping for here.

The theatre was on lockdown for about 10 minutes after the show because of a march outside. Once they let us leave we couldn't walk too far without running into police or protesters, so we bided our time at a nearby restaurant. Mrs. Piggy and I left once things seemed to die down. We were lucky, I guess, since our friends who stayed behind told us that tear gas came rolling down the street minutes after we left. Our friends were still in the restaurant when the tear gas happened and the place had to close their kitchen vents so the smoke wouldn't get in. I'm really glad Mrs. Piggy and I were out of the vicinity by then.

Don't worry, Anna didn't come with us and she was barely ever in harm's way. She was being babysat in a condo downtown by friends' parents. Once we got back to the condo we had to take a cab back to our house (our ride couldn't get to her car, because, ya know, tear gas). We got stuck in traffic because of some fracas on the on-ramp. I told the cab driver to roll his windows up ('cause, ya know, tear gas) and lock his doors ('cause, ya know, I get sort of paranoid).

Anna she was sort of weirded out by the riot cops and the flashing lights of cop cars. I made a game of it. Said the cops were wearing the same helmets I wore when I pressure washed our house. Pointed out the flashing lights and asked her what color they were. Then laughed at them. She played along, but we could tell she was a little shaken. This morning she stopped at the top of our front steps outside and wouldn't walk down. When I asked why, she just said "scared."

I don't know what that was about. For all I know there was just a weird shadow she wasn't sure about. Or maybe the events of last night shook her more than we thought. At any rate, she was back to her un-scared joyful self by this afternoon.

So Mrs. Piggy and I went downtown again today. Why, you ask? Well, you sure are the asky one, aren't you? If you must know, we went downtown today for the ultrasound!

Is Kid B a boy or a girl? I'll try to throw up the ultrasound photos tomorrow for the big reveal.

Wednesday, May 28, 2008

So, I Guess I'm Raising a Terrorist

Here is the most frightening job description I've heard in a while, as told by a University of Minnesota student via the City Pages:

What they (the FBI) were looking for, Carroll (not his real name) says, was an informant—someone to show up at “vegan potlucks” throughout the Twin Cities and rub shoulders with RNC protestors, schmoozing his way into their inner circles, then reporting back to the FBI’s Joint Terrorism Task Force, a partnership between multiple federal agencies and state and local law enfocement. The effort’s primary mission, according to the Minneapolis division’s website, is to “investigate terrorist acts carried out by groups or organizations which fall within the definition of terrorist groups as set forth in the current United States Attorney General Guidelines.”

If this kid's efforts resulted in an arrest, he would be paid money.

Read the City Pages article here.

Also, and I have to say this because it bugs the hell out of me, the first sentence of that paragraph I quoted up there is grammatically incorrect. It should say, "schmooze his way" and "report back".

But I digress.

I've decided to write a letter to the FBI, since they're probably reading this post seeing as how I've put the word "terrorist" in the title (Sweet! My readership just went up!).

Dear FBI,

Our next potluck will be at Como park, on June 21st, 1:00 p.m. at the picnic tables near the playground. We're having it by the playground because a lot of us have children. My little one (can you believe she's almost 2?!) loves slides and tunnels.

Oh, about the food. I'm bringing some spinach enchiladas. I think Jane will bring her kick-ass cookies again. Brett, Isabelle and their son Greg will bring the fruit salad. So ... let's see, maybe you could bring something to drink? Or maybe another main dish?

Could you wear your FBI windbreaker so we know who you are? Oh no, wait, that's right, you're just an informant. Well, I guess you'll know who we are by the pipe-bomb pieces and various explosives sitting next to our children's strollers (little Frank loves playing with the putty!).

OK, well, hope to see you there!

Al

p.s. Just in case a humorless agent actually reads this, I am of course joking. I have never made - and do not how to make - a bomb. I do not know anyone who has ever made - or knows how to make - a bomb. All of the vegans I know are nice, friendly, non-violent people.

Please leave us alone.

Thanks.